One time at the Snack Machine

I decided that I want some chips.  Cheetos, I think. The machine had already ripped me off once today.  But, hunger wins out everytime over brains. So I put my money in and push the buttons.  The mechanism slowly spins and then stops millimeters from releasing my chips.  I stare at them hoping the intense glare I am directing towards them will cause them to hop into my hand.  But no, they sit there mocking me and my hunger.  

My brain then says, "Shake it".  I look around sheepishly and seize the top of the machine and rock it back and forth.  I'm a wimp.  I know someone will walk around the corner and catch me. It's perfectly legit (hunger says), but I realize that my explanation sounds lame.  Sure enough here comes someone.  They ask "Did you lose money too?".  When I nod in the affirmative, she says "Did you shake the machine?".  With some trepidation I say, "Yes, but feels weird doing it".  "Oh don't worry I did the same", she says, "But it helps to really shake it hard".  So the two of us grabbed the machine and started pushing first one way, then another.  It started to rock back and forth but the bag of chips refused to let go of it's grip and continued to stare defiantly at us. Oh well I guess someone was trying to tell me I didn't need those chips after all.

I put a note on the machine for it's refusal to award me with my chosen treasure. Later in the week there was an envelope with my name on it attached to the machine with recompense. I haven't been hungry enough to brave the Vending Machine since.

My First Senior Moment (No Really)

There I was on a Friday afternoon at the gym. Trying to remember some of the Lorinda Death Workouts. So after sweating a Black Sea of sweat (is that really possible?) I headed out to do some shopping. Nope not clothes, nope not groceries. And certainly not tractors, definitely not motorcycles with sidecars, and absolutely not books about Sea Turtles. But I was shopping.

Walking from one store to the next, I’m walking but not being aware. It’s a pleasant sunny Autumn afternoon and I’m a retired person. So enjoying a pleasant Autumn afternoon is what I’m supposed to be doing. Spoiler Alert! Here it comes!

Suddenly, I’m flailing like Elaine dancing on Seinfeld. One step almost going over. Second step gaining, but very precariously heading into the danger zone. Third step brain has re-engaged and message to legs (“Get your #$%& together”), message received. Balance re-stored with no falling down of the ego. Quickly looking around with a “ I meant to do that” face I see that the sidewalk I was blithely walking on end in a 6” high curb. I start laughing as I realize I just pulled a “nose deep in cellphone” stunt, without a cellphone.

I survived though, so the rest of the afternoon should be good. Oh how wrong I could be. So finished shopping and was heading back to the car.

Start walking, being a bit more aware of the world around me. As I meander back I realize that I’m thinking about the fact that I’m a bit foggy on the exact locus of my CAR! Not to worry, it’s not a huge parking lot, just a very big parking lot. My brain says “Ok I am 100% positive we walked past this store, after we parked”. Now about the time my brain has said this precise thing for the last 4 stores, I start to think “Houston we have a problem”. So stopping to re-assess, I decide to strike out into the parking lot. Walking backwards and forwards, as my poor demented brain machine tries to work some weird illogical pattern. Hoping to Pacheinko it into finding said vehicle. HA! What Fun!! Not! I will never again laugh at jokes about old people.

I of course found my car.

I’d walked the parking lot muttering to myself and waving my clenched fists to the heavens. Cursing that pleasant autumn afternoon. Small children are being herded away from the path of the raving lunatic, birds start flying north instead of south due to the heaven cursing and as if by magic my car appears suddenly out of thin air. Ha if only, what a story that would make. And that’s Al’s first and probably not his last senior moment.

PS Now I just have to remember where I put my keys. “Refrigerator”-nope-check. “Microwave”-nope-check. ;-)

PaizoCon

So it's that time again for the RPG game con sponsored by Paizo the company that makes Pathfinder.  I haven't gone in a few years even though my group has gone every year.  I was following my other hobby, guns. This year though I decided that I needed to get back to my RPG roots.

It's going to be four days of gaming, food, booze, and gaming.  Always a good time.  I really enjoy hanging with my friends and killing orcs, and other bad creatures.  Also the social interaction is a bit out of my comfort zone at times but it's good for me.  

One of the games will be run by one of the creators of the Pathfinder system and it's based on the movie, Dale and Tucker vs Evil.  Now if you've never seen this movie, please go watch it, no really go right now and watch it!  We'll wait for you.............

Ok welcome back.  Great movie right?  The game should be just as great. 

So for four days I will be on another planet and in another dimension.  See you when I get back.

Checking in

Yep it's time for another foray into Al's retired life.

Not much to say this time around other than I'm waiting patiently for Sat to get here as it's once again time for the Speed Steel competition I like to shoot.  I did fairly well last month and then my other competition I came in 3rd, which on the surface doesn't sound that great but for me it's quite an accomplishment as I was only beaten by two of the premier shooters at this competition.  

I've got a week off from my trainer (thank goodness, ha just kidding L) but I still will get out of the house and away from the computer or should I say WoW.

The weather is lovely and reminds of one of the reasons I wanted to retire.  As any working person knows that there are times when you walk out the front door and have to go to work, and the birds are singing and the sun is shining and the grass is green, it's very difficult to not just say to hell with it and take the day off.  Well today, for me, was one of those days.  

Sorry for that but I used to feel your pain and now I don't.  Don't worry, you will all get there and you'll be happy you did.  It's the end goal or at least it was for me.

WoW and other stuff

So you may have guessed from the title that I've started playing WoW again.  Something fun to do instead of cleaning the condo or working out to keep my svelte form.  Ha just kidding....about the svelte thing.  :)

I have been over my comfortable weight since the holidays (yes Dec) and so as my annual physical is fast approaching I figure I should at least drop some weight before the doc tells me to.  Plus I'm not really into taking drugs so anything that keeps me off any high blood pressure meds is a good thing.  No matter what the right shoulder guy says about nachos (or totchos for that matter).

So healthier eating and not so much junk (not that I eat that much to begin with, junk that is).  I have started to put the meal in a small bowl so it really does look like I'm eating a gigantic serving, of course I made enough for seconds so.... And I've started to use chopsticks instead of a fork.  "They" say it's supposed to slow you down and make you feel that full feeling before you've eaten three bowls of ice cream.  Instead of just the one you planned on eating.

If you are a practised user of chopsticks, good for you.  I'm not bad but definitely it is slowing me down.  I also look at it as a hand exercise, so hey I'm good  all around.  I expect the shooting hand will appreciate that on competition days.

Well no going back now

So it's official I'm retired.  Got my first check from Social Security today. I guess I can stop thinking I'm on vacation and start doing the stuff I said I'd do when I retired.  

No more excuses when it comes to things like going to the gym on a regular basis, getting to the range during the week to practice, and in general doing things that I couldn't do because I had to get up and go to a job.  Of course the job thing may still be a thing but we'll see how well I can budget and not succumb to the evils of laziness and procrastination

I now have the time to go see movies anytime I want and of course just getting outside during the nice summer weather we will be getting here soon.

Playing more D&D is also a good possibility.  When working it's hard to justify staying up late during the work week so this is a also something I want to pursue. Plus PaizoCon is in the near future and I feel good about attending that.  I could have done that when working but since it is at the end of May, getting the time off would have been a hassle.  Now it isn't.  ;)  

No Pressure

So here we are again. Went to the gym today and walked on the treadmill for 42min.  I actually like walking on the treadmill as it's somewhat dreamlike in the sense of moving forward but not getting anywhere.

I'm also still figuring out this retired thing.  Today besides the gym trip I stopped at Les Schwab to get my studded tires replaced with normal weather tires.  So don't blame me if in the next few days it snows like crazy.  As I no longer have that responsibility to get somewhere I, in a way, hope so.  Sorry.

This weekend will be a shooting weekend.  It's my Sat competition and I look forward to doing some shooting.  I was mentioning to another of my shooting friends that I will have been shooting every weekend for the last 5 weeks and it looks like I'll be adding a few more weeks to that.