Friends

Friends

  So I just spent an incredible two days with a woman.

So the journey that brought me to that statement probably started sixty some years ago.  When I was a little kid in Iowa, we got an allowance just like most kids.  I spent that twenty-five cents on a Mad Magazine and thus the journey was started.  That twenty-five cents disappeared like water down the drain but it was worth it.  I always laugh at the back page of Mad Magazine...but I digress.  The point is I was and always have been a reader.  I still went outside and played with my friends but also got yelled at to turn my bedside light out and go to sleep at night.  And that Mad Magazine was the gateway drug to my love of comic books.  Fast forward to the 70's, ah the 70's.  I've told the story before in another place about discovering comic book stores but that brings me to my first friend who would help influence my life.  The store owner was a cool 70's type guy.  Also addicted to cocaine but like I said a 70's guy.  He was a smart guy though and kicked the addiction.  That friendship would carry me thru the rest of the century.  He suggested me for a job in the 80's that lead back to helping him run his empire of comic book stores and that lead to a friendship that helped take me down another path.  The journey continued into the 90's.  What a decade!  It was my aha decade.  In the 90's I ran one of the comic book stores in this empire and so met another friend who would alter my life once again.  I discovered D&D thru that friend and I continued to read.  Over the last few decades I'd started dabbling with writing, never anything I'd show anyone but I could dream, right?  So as Y2K approached I made another decision that would change my life.  My latest friend, who now had a wife(who I also considered a friend), and a young son (who would again become a friend), had moved to another city, Bellingham. I decided that I needed a change of life. Seattle was becoming too much of a big city and don't get me started on the traffic. So I moved. With that move the next steps of the journey began. Part of that move included a new job.  I spent the 2000's working at the new job, reading and occasionally writing stuff that would never see the light of day.  I met more friends as friends introduced me to their friends and so the circle got bigger. Thanx to this I quit one job and started a new job.  Again thru a recommendation from one of these friends that had become part of my life.  We all had similar interests but also each had an interest that the others might not have learned about if we'd never met.  

  By this time I'd started worrying about my weight.  I've always been a heavy or as it was fashionable to say back in the 60's, big boned guy.  I'd ballooned up to 304lbs, yes very specific number.  At 5'8" that was totally unacceptable and rather dangerous if I planned on fulfilling my dream of living forever.  So working with a nutritionist in the mid 2000's I'd gotten down to 250lbs.  Still not great but way better than the 300 number.  Of course once I stopped going to the nutritionist I gained most of it back.  Did I go to the gym, you ask?  Damn right, but with no direction or accountability it made no difference. At this point it was 2010 and I was still reading whenever I could.  The writing was also happening, but hidden away like a Playboy magazine hidden under the bed, only coming out at night when the urge surfaced.  A lot going on for me at that point in the journey but it was getting ready to take me on a new friend path.  As I said I'd gained back a portion of the weight I'd lost, back up to 280lbs.  Rather disappointing if you ask me. Don't worry I'd realized that now was the time to ask for help.  So I did, amazingly enough.  My gym offered personal training with certified trainers.  I'd thought about trying it out and now was the time to get off the couch.  So my next step on the journey turned out to be my biggest, in hindsight.  And one of the most influential.  

  So to summarize, I'd been pretending to write for a few decades, I'd kept most of the fast food restaurants in business in the 70's, 80's, and part of the 90's.  I'd joined multiple gyms over those decades and now I was ready to try to make amends. So I met the trainer, Lorinda, we talked about what I wanted from her.  I was adamant that I didn't want a drill sergeant and I wasn't interested in the latest craze at the time, Crossfit.  She agreed that that wasn't the best move for me.  So we agreed to meet that Sat to start this new journey.  So I am going to digress here for a moment and say I only saw this as a monetary relationship that was going to get me to the goal of living forever.  There was no expectation of anything beyond that.  Now it makes me laugh at my naivety in hindsight.  Yes Lorinda is the woman mentioned in the opening sentence.  So more digression and an explanation.  First she's a beautiful woman inside and out.  Yes I was very happy that this woman was willing to work with me and so as time went on I grew attached to her.  One day, as she was laughing at a stupid story I had just told, I realized she wasn't just a casual acquaintance but had become one of my friends that I counted on in my life. Then mind blown as she, with no prompting on my part, let me know she thought of me as one of her friends also.  About this time it came up that, yes she was a lesbian and was even getting ready to marry her sweetheart (another woman who would become a friend of mine).  Then she told me about her memoir she was writing about her life.  She even shared some of it and it made me cry for my friend.  In a casual conversation when she was making me groan and sweat on the weight machine I mentioned something writing related.  She looked at me and almost demanded I expand on my comment.  Sheepishly I admitted to the bits and pieces of writing I'd pretended to do over the years and with that the next step was taken.  She cajoled me into showing her some of the goofy stuff I'd written over the years.  How surprised was I when next we met she had high, well not really high but still praise for my attempts at something I'd always considered a pipe dream.  After all I hadn't gone to college and was barely able to tell a comma from a semi-colon.  I could spell with the aid of a dictionary and where did the noun and verbs really go?  

  So it's been seven years of sweat, laughter, and fears, and it brings us back to that opening line.  By the way, shame on you for assuming the meaning of that opening line.  Again this friend of mine, still makes me smile when I say that, convinced me to stretch and move considerably outside my comfort zone.  Those two incredible days I've mentioned?  I attended the Chuckanut Writer's conference during those two days and I would have never even considered doing that if it wasn't for my friendships with all of my friends that lead to my friendship with Lorinda.  And it gets better.  She then convinced me to actually read some of the story she'd pushed me to start writing, to a room full of strangers.  Again so far out of my comfort zone it's not even in this galaxy.  They laughed at all the funny parts and no one got up and walked out as I was reading. So there's that. 

I would never have written any of this if it wasn't for all the friends I've met and made over the years of my life.  So thank you all for being my friend and putting up with my weirdness.  That journey of friends lead me to this moment in my life and I wouldn't change one step of that path.  And that path lead me to Lorinda.  My friend.

One time at the Snack Machine

I decided that I want some chips.  Cheetos, I think. The machine had already ripped me off once today.  But, hunger wins out everytime over brains. So I put my money in and push the buttons.  The mechanism slowly spins and then stops millimeters from releasing my chips.  I stare at them hoping the intense glare I am directing towards them will cause them to hop into my hand.  But no, they sit there mocking me and my hunger.  

My brain then says, "Shake it".  I look around sheepishly and seize the top of the machine and rock it back and forth.  I'm a wimp.  I know someone will walk around the corner and catch me. It's perfectly legit (hunger says), but I realize that my explanation sounds lame.  Sure enough here comes someone.  They ask "Did you lose money too?".  When I nod in the affirmative, she says "Did you shake the machine?".  With some trepidation I say, "Yes, but feels weird doing it".  "Oh don't worry I did the same", she says, "But it helps to really shake it hard".  So the two of us grabbed the machine and started pushing first one way, then another.  It started to rock back and forth but the bag of chips refused to let go of it's grip and continued to stare defiantly at us. Oh well I guess someone was trying to tell me I didn't need those chips after all.

I put a note on the machine for it's refusal to award me with my chosen treasure. Later in the week there was an envelope with my name on it attached to the machine with recompense. I haven't been hungry enough to brave the Vending Machine since.

My First Senior Moment (No Really)

There I was on a Friday afternoon at the gym. Trying to remember some of the Lorinda Death Workouts. So after sweating a Black Sea of sweat (is that really possible?) I headed out to do some shopping. Nope not clothes, nope not groceries. And certainly not tractors, definitely not motorcycles with sidecars, and absolutely not books about Sea Turtles. But I was shopping.

Walking from one store to the next, I’m walking but not being aware. It’s a pleasant sunny Autumn afternoon and I’m a retired person. So enjoying a pleasant Autumn afternoon is what I’m supposed to be doing. Spoiler Alert! Here it comes!

Suddenly, I’m flailing like Elaine dancing on Seinfeld. One step almost going over. Second step gaining, but very precariously heading into the danger zone. Third step brain has re-engaged and message to legs (“Get your #$%& together”), message received. Balance re-stored with no falling down of the ego. Quickly looking around with a “ I meant to do that” face I see that the sidewalk I was blithely walking on end in a 6” high curb. I start laughing as I realize I just pulled a “nose deep in cellphone” stunt, without a cellphone.

I survived though, so the rest of the afternoon should be good. Oh how wrong I could be. So finished shopping and was heading back to the car.

Start walking, being a bit more aware of the world around me. As I meander back I realize that I’m thinking about the fact that I’m a bit foggy on the exact locus of my CAR! Not to worry, it’s not a huge parking lot, just a very big parking lot. My brain says “Ok I am 100% positive we walked past this store, after we parked”. Now about the time my brain has said this precise thing for the last 4 stores, I start to think “Houston we have a problem”. So stopping to re-assess, I decide to strike out into the parking lot. Walking backwards and forwards, as my poor demented brain machine tries to work some weird illogical pattern. Hoping to Pacheinko it into finding said vehicle. HA! What Fun!! Not! I will never again laugh at jokes about old people.

I of course found my car.

I’d walked the parking lot muttering to myself and waving my clenched fists to the heavens. Cursing that pleasant autumn afternoon. Small children are being herded away from the path of the raving lunatic, birds start flying north instead of south due to the heaven cursing and as if by magic my car appears suddenly out of thin air. Ha if only, what a story that would make. And that’s Al’s first and probably not his last senior moment.

PS Now I just have to remember where I put my keys. “Refrigerator”-nope-check. “Microwave”-nope-check. ;-)

PaizoCon

So it's that time again for the RPG game con sponsored by Paizo the company that makes Pathfinder.  I haven't gone in a few years even though my group has gone every year.  I was following my other hobby, guns. This year though I decided that I needed to get back to my RPG roots.

It's going to be four days of gaming, food, booze, and gaming.  Always a good time.  I really enjoy hanging with my friends and killing orcs, and other bad creatures.  Also the social interaction is a bit out of my comfort zone at times but it's good for me.  

One of the games will be run by one of the creators of the Pathfinder system and it's based on the movie, Dale and Tucker vs Evil.  Now if you've never seen this movie, please go watch it, no really go right now and watch it!  We'll wait for you.............

Ok welcome back.  Great movie right?  The game should be just as great. 

So for four days I will be on another planet and in another dimension.  See you when I get back.

Checking in

Yep it's time for another foray into Al's retired life.

Not much to say this time around other than I'm waiting patiently for Sat to get here as it's once again time for the Speed Steel competition I like to shoot.  I did fairly well last month and then my other competition I came in 3rd, which on the surface doesn't sound that great but for me it's quite an accomplishment as I was only beaten by two of the premier shooters at this competition.  

I've got a week off from my trainer (thank goodness, ha just kidding L) but I still will get out of the house and away from the computer or should I say WoW.

The weather is lovely and reminds of one of the reasons I wanted to retire.  As any working person knows that there are times when you walk out the front door and have to go to work, and the birds are singing and the sun is shining and the grass is green, it's very difficult to not just say to hell with it and take the day off.  Well today, for me, was one of those days.  

Sorry for that but I used to feel your pain and now I don't.  Don't worry, you will all get there and you'll be happy you did.  It's the end goal or at least it was for me.

WoW and other stuff

So you may have guessed from the title that I've started playing WoW again.  Something fun to do instead of cleaning the condo or working out to keep my svelte form.  Ha just kidding....about the svelte thing.  :)

I have been over my comfortable weight since the holidays (yes Dec) and so as my annual physical is fast approaching I figure I should at least drop some weight before the doc tells me to.  Plus I'm not really into taking drugs so anything that keeps me off any high blood pressure meds is a good thing.  No matter what the right shoulder guy says about nachos (or totchos for that matter).

So healthier eating and not so much junk (not that I eat that much to begin with, junk that is).  I have started to put the meal in a small bowl so it really does look like I'm eating a gigantic serving, of course I made enough for seconds so.... And I've started to use chopsticks instead of a fork.  "They" say it's supposed to slow you down and make you feel that full feeling before you've eaten three bowls of ice cream.  Instead of just the one you planned on eating.

If you are a practised user of chopsticks, good for you.  I'm not bad but definitely it is slowing me down.  I also look at it as a hand exercise, so hey I'm good  all around.  I expect the shooting hand will appreciate that on competition days.

Well no going back now

So it's official I'm retired.  Got my first check from Social Security today. I guess I can stop thinking I'm on vacation and start doing the stuff I said I'd do when I retired.  

No more excuses when it comes to things like going to the gym on a regular basis, getting to the range during the week to practice, and in general doing things that I couldn't do because I had to get up and go to a job.  Of course the job thing may still be a thing but we'll see how well I can budget and not succumb to the evils of laziness and procrastination

I now have the time to go see movies anytime I want and of course just getting outside during the nice summer weather we will be getting here soon.

Playing more D&D is also a good possibility.  When working it's hard to justify staying up late during the work week so this is a also something I want to pursue. Plus PaizoCon is in the near future and I feel good about attending that.  I could have done that when working but since it is at the end of May, getting the time off would have been a hassle.  Now it isn't.  ;)